Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Flight 2019 ready for take off

Hello Friends,

My final post in 2018 I would like to share these thoughts with you.  As 2018 comes to a close I think about the fact that I'm not exactly where I wanted to be right now but I'm also not where I was this time last year.  I'm not talking about my physical location I'm talking about my growth.  I look back over all the things that have happened in 2018 and there were losses, I lost friends and close friends lost loved ones and friends but there were also many gains, which I like to refer to as blessings.  Many family members and close friends welcomed new babies and grand babies into their lives.  Where there is loss there are also gains in life.  I think about how I spent 260 of 365 days this year in the Dominican Republic with my husband.  Although I've been very sad about not being able to spend Christmas and New Years with him this year I was so blessed to be able to spend the majority of the year with him.  This was our last picture together in 2018 the day before I left to come back for the holidays. 

 

As I said before I'm not exactly where I wanted to be but I am headed in the right direction.  I wish you all a Happy New Year and I do wish that you were all able to focus on the blessings and get your goals lined up for 2019 and start working on them as soon as you can.  I'm going to be spending more time with my mom working on our combined business goals. Here is a picture of mom and I from Christmas.

This was posted on Facebook by a friend of mine.  I borrowed it (with permission) and it received very good feedback so I thought I share it here with you as well.

Hello, welcome to Flight #2019. We are prepared to take off into the New Year. Please make sure your Attitude and Blessings are secured and locked in an upright position. All self-destructive devices should be turned off at this time. All negativity, hurt and discouragement should be put away. Should we lose Altitude under pressure, during the flight, reach up and pull down a Prayer. Prayers will automatically be activated by Faith. Once your Faith is activated you can assist other passengers. There will be NO BAGGAGE allowed on this flight. The Captain (GOD) has cleared us for takeoff. Destination GREATNESS. Repost and book your flight!!!❤️❤️ Yessssss I have already purchased my ticket! !!!!!!!! I'M BUCKLED IN AND READY FOR TAKEOFF!!!!

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Remember to focus on the blessings

Hello All:

Well I'm headed back to PA for the holidays without my hubby.  Yes I'm a little sad about it but I'm remaining prayerful and positive, that he will join me shortly after the first of the year.  Last year we were able to spend the holidays together and it was nice.  I have always wanted to be on the beach for Christmas and last year I got my wish.  It was nice because I love the beach but honestly I missed being home with my children and grand babies. This year I have a new grand baby so I must be home this year to witness his reaction to his first Christmas (Picture enclosed).  He's only 6 months old now so it probably won't be much of a reaction LOL.  So yes I am flying back to the cold for the holidays when so many are seeking warm I'm purposely headed towards the cold. 

Although I won't get to be with my husband for the holidays this year I remain thankful for the fact that he's in my life period.  When I think of all the past holidays that I spent alone, without a mate or partner it's nice to know that even though he's not by my side, he's still in my life.  I recently posted this message on Facebook and I thought it deserved a re post here.

Life presents us with so many challenges on a daily basis.  It's easy to get caught up with those and focus on the one thing that went wrong.  While doing so we forget to be thankful for all of the other things that went right.

Things did not go as planned for me this month but there were so many unexpected blessings I received this year, heck in my life so I'm not going to pout about this one thing.  My husband is wonderful and he knows when I'm sad and he does everything he can to bring a smile back to my face.  Yesterday we spent the day together at the beach.  It was a wonderful day.  

So anyway my friends I wish you all Happy Holidays and if you haven't purchased or downloaded your copy of my book Passport Wife yet.  What are you waiting for?  Get yours today.  Here's the link. Passport Wife

If you would like a signed copy please visit my website here www.authorterrid.com and click on the contact me tab and send  your request.

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - To be continued

Hello my friends.  First I want to say Thank You to you all who sent messages of encouragement and for all of those who silently prayed for us.  This picture is from the night before our interview.  While we were in the capital we went to a baseball game.  My husbands team won and we had a great time. It was a great distraction for me because I was very nervous.

Unfortunately we still do not have a Visa for my husband.  We were not denied but there are additional documents required before they will issue a Visa for him.   I have to be honest I was devastated.  I did everything I thought possible to make sure we were prepared and had everything in order.  At was very disheartening to sit there at the embassy for over an hour and watch so many other couples leave smiling, kissing and holding hands.  Then when it was our turn for us not to have the positive outcome we desired.  I sank into a very deep dark place for a few days.  I mean I was in a very bad state.  I didn't leave the house for three days after we got back from the embassy.  Again I must say that my inner circle or my camp as I like to refer to them now is strong.  My family and friends would not allow me to stay in that  place.  The text messages,phone calls, Facebook posts etc that I received helped to bring me out of the low place.  I was reminded to think about all of my blessings and to not give up this fight because it's been a long journey and we are at the finish line. 

As I was slowly coming out of the funk I was in I realized that I had lost sight of what was truly important.  For the past couple of months I have been so focused on getting the interview date and then once we got the date I was so focused on making sure everything was prepared.  I missed enjoying my time here on this beautiful island with my husband.  I was reminded that when I took my marriage vows I didn't promise to love him only if he came to the United States.  I agreed to (in Spanish of course) some version of for better or worse.  So at the first sign of worse I was ready to crawl up in a ball and just give up.  Well my friends once I realized these things about myself and my attitude I was able to pull myself together and out of the deep hole I was in. Again it really helped to have so many people calling and checking on me.

While scrolling through Facebook yesterday I found this meme and it said everything I needed it to say.
I wasn't able to save the picture but it said: 

Sometimes the best thing that you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine, not obsess.  Just breathe and have faith that everything will work out for the best.

So my friends I may not return with my husband for Christmas as I hoped this year but all will be well and eventually he will join me in the United States.  Until then please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.  

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Prayer Warriors report for duty

Hello everyone - I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday with your families.  I was in PA for the holiday and it was nice to be with my family eating good food and spending time with my grand babies.  We were missing a few, my son Steven is now in California and my sister and her crew went to visit her husband's family in Alabama this year.  So we had a smaller crowd but we still had a great time even though my Redskins lost.

In my last post I was feeling pretty defeated, hence the title in the valley.  A few days after that post we received notice about his interview date.  I didn't post anything about it prior to now  because honestly we've been so busy trying to get everything done in preparation for it and it's been a pretty nerve wracking few weeks..  So this post is titled Prayer Warriors report for duty because his visa interview is tomorrow, Monday December 3rd at 10:00 am.  This is the moment we've been waiting for.  To say that we are both excited and nervous would be putting it very mildly.  Nothing we've encountered up until we received our interview date three weeks ago compares to the challenges we've faced since getting our date.  When the email came through with our interview date we were both elated.  That feeling was quickly replaced with panic, confusion, anger and frustration just to name a few.  I truly believe that this process is built to test your resolve as a couple.  We had so many little hurdles thrown at us and encountered a few speed bumps along the way.  Although it was rough at times to get to this point I am happy to report that we are all ready.  We have about 24 hours to go and I'm optimistic that we're prepared and we will have a favorable outcome tomorrow.  We do need your help though.  Please all of my prayer warriors report for duty.  I need you all to raise your hands up high to the heavens and in your own way ask God to bless us and this interview tomorrow.  Send lots of prayers up so that the blessings will rain down on us tomorrow.

Just so you all know who you're praying for I've included a few pictures of our journey together as a couple.  From our very first picture together to the last one we took a short time ago.

This is the first picture that we took together back in February 2017.

One of our favorite pictures from our wedding day October 21st, 2017

This is the last picture that we took together November 3rd, 2018

Thanks everyone in advance for your positive thoughts and prayers.  I will certainly keep you all posted on the outcome.

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - In the valley

Hello everyone.  This is a hard one for me to write.  I considered not writing but it's been a few weeks and it's not fair to only write about the good stuff all the time.  This post is titled in the valley because that's where I am right now.  I'm feeling a little down.  Good news first always.  The latest update on the immigration process for my husband is that all of our documents have been reviewed and approved by the NVC (National Visa Center) so now we wait to be assigned an interview date.  The bad news is that getting a date can take months.  It's a very confusing process but there are various types of visas and when you apply you are given a priority date and there are expected timelines associated to those visa types and priority dates.  Even though all of our paperwork is in order and approved we must wait until our priority processing date window in order to proceed.  So with that said my hopes of my husband being in the United States for the holidays this year have been crushed.  My lawyer said it shouldn't take more than six months which seems like a long time to wait for an appointment but I know that he really doesn't know and he's not in control of it.  I'm praying that's worse case scenario.  So that's where we are with that.  I'm going to be heading home for the holidays alone this year.  Last year I chose to spend Christmas here in the Dominican Republic with my husband but this year I will be stateside to celebrate with my family and my newest grand baby.  I can't miss his first Christmas.  While I'm here I will continue to enjoy the wonderful weather and time with my hubby of course.  A couple of pics from our most recent beach trip to share with you.

The next blow recently is that since June I've been anticipating starting a new job sometime between October and January.  I just recently found out that the contract didn't go through so I don't have a job waiting for me when I get home.  This is a setback but I'm choosing to believe that since it didn't happen that wasn't the job for me.  Since I took the early retirement in April of 2017 I've been on this journey of discovering my purpose.  I was excited about the job because it was familiar.  It matched perfectly with my skill set from my previous jobs.  Maybe that's why things didn't work out.  I don't believe that I left my corporate job to return to another one.  I believe there's something else way outside of my box that I'm supposed to be doing with my life.  The challenge now is to figure out what that is before my savings runs out LOL.  So my friends I am currently in the valley but I've been here before and I usually don't stay here long.

Good news is that my latest book Passport Wife is currently at the printer and I will have books available within the next few weeks.  It will be available for download also within the next week.

Contact me via email AuthorTerriD@gmail.com to request  your paperback copy.  I am also working on some other writing projects with other authors so stay tuned for more from Tdub Publishing in the future. 

Also I'm continuing my work with my non profit A Blessing For You and blessing as many expectant mothers in need as possible.  We have over two dozen basket request to fill before the end of this year and we could really use your support in order to do so.  Please consider being a blessing to someone else and making a donation.  No donation is too small. https://www.gofundme.com/manage/blessing-baskets-for-new-moms#


Last but not least friends prayer is powerful and if  you're a praying person please add me and my husband into your prayers.  This has been a very long tiresome journey.  I think we both could use a break.  I thank you in advance for your kind thoughts and prayers.

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - One year down and a lifetime to go

It's hard for me to believe that it's been a year since I got married again.  It's a day that I won't forget.  The ceremony and the reception were amazing.  It was actually my dream wedding.  Although I had been married before I never had a real wedding where I wore a wedding gown and had a reception.  I should mention that it was all put together by my husband and his family.  It took me totally by surprise.  I expected a small private ceremony at our house.  The only thing I regret about that day now is that all of my special people weren't there to witness it.  That is the only thing I would change.

It has been a year full of learning experiences.  Some good and some have required a lot of patience and prayer on my part.  I have learned so much from my husband, not just about his culture but simple life lessons. We have figured out how to communicate with each other and it's sort of an unwritten rule that we don't leave conflict or thick air between us for too long.  Even when we can't agree and neither one of us wants to back down, one of us finds a way to say I love you even though I don't agree with you.  Trust me I'm not trying to paint a rosy picture because where there are roses there are also thorns.  There have been many days and nights where I've thought to myself What the heck did you do and why?  I've wondered how could this possibly work when we're from different cultures, we aren't fluent in each others native language.  There's a significant age difference.  So many things seemingly working against us but yet as I write this today I feel as though our relationship is much stronger today than it was a year ago when we took our vows.  We've learned how to bridge those gaps with prayer, love and compromise.  Again not perfect by any means but as my grandmother used to say anything worth having takes work. This past year has been work ya'll I mean real work  but I've enjoyed almost every minute of it lol.

I remember one day my husband and I were having a difficult time communicating and I said to him that I wished he could understand everything I said.  He said the most profound thing to me.  He said that God knew what he was doing when he made our relationship so quiet.  He said that if he could understand everything I said to him we probably wouldn't be together.  LOL okay that's funny but oh so true as well.  Another fond memory I have is one time when we were disagreeing and we couldn't seem to compromise I said well I'm not sure how this is going to work.  He looked at me and said I don't know either but I love you.  With that we agreed to disagree on that issue but mutual trust, love and respect always wins.  That mutual respect thing is a big one.  I can honestly say that in my prior relationships that was the biggest missing piece.  I do realize that it's still early and I guess we are still technically in the honeymoon phase and although that's true we've reached this one year milestone in the face of adversity and honestly a bunch of people holding their breath because it seemed too good to be true.  At times I was also holding my breath.  I can't recall when I finally exhaled and decided to embrace it but I did and it's been such a relief.  Taking each moment as it comes and just enjoying it as much as possible.  I'm not saying it's okay to just live in the moment and never have a plan but I'm saying that while we're planning enjoy the moments along the way.

I also realize that one of biggest challenges lies ahead of us, him coming to the United States.  To this point our relationship has been in somewhat of a controlled environment.  I've been doing all the compromising, learning and growing from a cultural standpoint.  When it's his turn to experience a completely different culture will he be able to adapt as well as I have?  That's the wildcard but again based on the foundation we've built over the past two years that we've been together I feel confident that we will be able to navigate our way through the storms that may lie ahead.  He doesn't read my blogs but I'll say it anyway Happy Anniversary Amor.  I'm looking forward to many more years to come.

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Things just keep getting better

Hey everyone.  It's been two weeks since I got back so it was time for an update.  Right before I came back my husband lost his job.  The reason why is still a little fuzzy to me but it's okay he was going to quit soon anyway once he gets his visa.  I must admit I was a little concerned about how things would be with us both being here at the house all day long.  I have been very pleasantly surprised at how well we've adapted to having so much time together LOL.  Since I've been back my husband has been doing the majority of the cooking which is awesome because I love his cooking.  Let me tell ya'll something.  He makes the best potato salad.  It's just so good and I don't understand why LOL.  He's also been doing most of the cleaning and washing the clothes.  Okay so when he cooks I usually end up cleaning up the kitchen and it's a real chore.  I do not know how he gets food everywhere while he cooks but I'm not going to worry about it.  The food is always good and I don't mind cleaning up the kitchen.  Here are a couple of pictures from Snap chat I took of his cooking.

We've been handling the household chores together.  Like washing clothes he does the heavy duty work, the washing, rinsing, softening etc process  and I hang the clothes on the line and then retrieve them and put everything away.  There are fewer trips to the grocery store and we have been doing the grocery shopping together also which I really enjoy.  More beach time and pool time together.  My husband recently discovered this little restaurant by the beach and he loves their food. I say he recently discovered because I already knew about it and would often go there for lunch while he was at work.  Yesterday we just went there for lunch.  Sat by the water ate and enjoyed each others company.  It was awesome. So you see why I titled this one things just keep getting better? 

You might be wondering what I'm doing ll day long if he's basically doing all the things I used to do during the day.  Well I spent a lot of time stalking the NVC's (National Visa Centers) website and harassing my attorney's paralegal.   I mentioned in a prior post that we got approval from the Department of Immigration so now our case is with the NVC.  We have provided them with all of the requested documentation so now we wait for them to review everything and set a date for his via interview.  I stalk their website daily to check for any updates which is completely unnecessary because they email you whenever there is a change but I just can't help myself.  The other day I received an email that there was an update to our case while we were outside washing clothes.  I ran into the house and logged into their website, well I should say I tried to log into their website because it literally took me two hours to get into their website.  It is the most frustrating process.  Each and every time I try to log into it it takes me multiple attempts and lots of time.  I'm persistent though so I think after trying for like 50 times it just gives up and lets me in LOL.  So anyway the other day there was an issue with the marriage certificate that needed to be handled.  I feel so bad for the paralegal in my attorneys office because I gave her the blues.  I mean once I got into the website and saw what was wrong I sent her like three emails which she didn't respond to within 5 minutes so then I called her LOL.  I was surprised she took my call but she did.  So after she investigates what is needed which was the certified version of the marriage certificate she tells me that I need to have it translated to English.  I became unglued.  I didn't understand why a Spanish document needed to be translated to English for what I thought was a Spanish agency.  Notice how I said what I thought?  Well I was wrong and after giving her the blues about it I was able to get it translated and back to her within 2 hours.  I did include an apology to her in the email because I was a little rude.  I'm sure I'm not the only one who has gotten snippy with her because this process is very nerve racking. 

When I'm not stalking the NVC or harassing paralegals I've been meddling with my two daughters lives.  They are both apartment hunting right now.  One has a hard date of November 1st to be out of her existing place and the other just needs to find her way out of my house as soon as possible :-). So I've been looking for places and sending them leads.  Also been keeping busy with A Blessing For You.  We've received several dozen basket request within the past few weeks and unfortunately very little donations.  We're going to have to stop accepting requests for awhile and work on getting more donations.  If you're reading this and feel so inclined to donate you can do so in two ways.  1) We have a go fund me:
https://www.gofundme.com/blessing-baskets-for-new-moms&rcid=r01-153869132542-049bba7fb0b8457c&pc=ot_co_campmgmt_w

2) You can also donate supplies from the attached list:

I'm also still working on getting my latest book released this year.  Fingers and toes crossed that it can still happen.

That's all for now.  Until next time everyone be blessed.  Remember to try to be a blessing to someone else everyday in some way. 

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Transitions

Hello everyone.  It's been a few weeks so it's time to catch you all up on what's been going on.  I returned to PA on September 1st.  It was good to be home.  I missed my people so much.  My family (most of them LOL) ) and my friends (even though I didn't get to see everyone) and my grand babies are all growing like little weeds. They are so precious.  I love their hugs and smiles.  I can't stand to hear them cry.  Ask my daughter she will tell you as soon as I hear crying I want to know what the problem is.  Whatever they want or need you better get it to them quick LOL.  I arrived in Harrisburg just in time for my oldest grandson's birthday.  Here is a picture of him while we sang to him.  

I was able to pull together my first blessing basket assembly event while I was in PA.  Thanks to my daughter Jasmine and many others who assisted and came out to support me.  We were able to collect supplies to enable us to fill more baskets.  During the event we gave out three baskets and assembled baskets for our October expectant mom's.  We've partnered with Systems of Care and we plan to collaborate on how to connect the recipients of the blessing baskets with other community resources to provide additional assistance as needed. We have many more basket requests to fill and are still in need of supplies and/or donations to assist us with filling them. Here is a link to our current campaign.
https://www.gofundme.com/manage/blessing-baskets-for-new-moms

I stayed in Harrisburg for a week before leaving the country again.  My youngest daughter and I went on a nice 5 day vacation with some other wonderful ladies to Mexico.  We had a great time enjoying the nice weather by the pool and the spa was amazing. I'm looking forward to girls trip 2019.  Here is a picture which was the view from our balcony.    While I was there I sent my husband a picture of the view and he sent me a picture of his view which I won't share with you all at this time LOL.  I will share a cute picture of my grand dog wearing a little sombrero that my daughter bought in Mexico. 


After Mexico I was back in town for 9 days and those days are a blur.  I titled this post transitions because that's truly where I am right now.  As I prepared to return to my husband in the Dominican Republic it was very different.  I mentioned in my previous post that we received approval from the Department of Immigration for my petition to allow my husband to come to the US.  As of this time all paperwork has been submitted to the National Visa Center and we are awaiting an interview date.  We are close to the finish line.  As I prepared to return it was a different mindset for me because I'm starting to transition back to PA and not thinking about extended time in the Dominican Republic.  While I was home I began to purge and make room for my husbands things.  Mentally making a list of all the things I should take care of before he comes.  Since his arrival date is still up in the air I might be able to get some of them done.  My mind is so focused on being back in PA that I actually forgot to pack some necessary items.

I was away for exactly three weeks.  When I left I tried to leave things in order for my husband and the days leading up to my return as we talked he assured me that he was preparing the house for my return.  Well let's talk about that for a minute LOL.  He met me at the airport, was on time which was awesome.  There's been some issues with that in past but I won't get into that now.  Ya'll are going to have to read my book to get those details.  Anyway we get to the house and when he opens the door at first glance things appear to be in pretty good shape considering the amount of time I was gone.  The day before my return he mentioned to me that he was washing clothes.  Well he did wash the clothes.  As I opened the bedroom door I was met by a mound of clothes on the bed.  So he washed the clothes and hung them to dry but the putting them away part didn't happen.  That's cool though putting them away is the easy part.  Well it is if you aren't met with even more clothes which happen to be dirty in the spaces where you are trying to put the clean clothes.  Again no big deal, he made an effort so I didn't fuss. 

My kitchen was bare, like everything visible that could be eaten was gone.  I say visible because I did have surplus supplies, snacks etc hidden and he didn't find them LOL.  He did attempt to clean up and I say attempt because I've found several dishes that needed a redo since I've been back.  Everything needed to be put back in it's proper (according to me) place LOL.  If you've been following my blogs you may recall that I have this inside/outside thing with the mops and brooms.  Well when I returned both mops were inside and both brooms were outside.  I truly give up on trying to keep this straight at this point.  I know that I'm anal about this stuff so I laugh at myself and try to not take it so seriously but sometimes it's hard to do. 

So for now I'm back here waiting with my husband for his paperwork to be processed and his interview to be scheduled.  We have no idea how long this phase of the process will take.  I could be weeks or months.  All we can do is wait.  Meanwhile I will attempt to soak up as much of this warm weather as I can as it seems we will be heading back to PA during the cold winter months.  Stay tuned for more on our Visa watch or shall I say wait process and maybe an update on a release date for my book, Passport Wife in my next blog entry.  Thanks for reading. 

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - The Finish Line

Hello everyone.  I am so excited to report that we finally got a response from immigration about my petition for my husband to come to the United States.  My petition was approved YAY!!!  Now we wait for the approval on this end for his actual visa but after eight long months of waiting I feel like I can finally see the finish line.  I pray this next part doesn't take 8 months.  Reality is setting in for me that I'm going to be spending this coming winter back in PA.  I'm a little sad about that.  My body has gotten accustomed to this warm climate so snow and ice are going to be culture shock for both me and my husband.

My birthday was on August 20th and my husband did a great job pulling together a wonderful celebration for me on the beach.  I love the beach and he tolerates it for me.  One of the many reasons why I love him.  This was the first time we were together on my birthday and I had a wonderful time spending the day with my husband, his family and our friends here.  I did miss my family and friends back home though terribly but they called, texted and sang to me as usual so all was well.  Although I'm not very excited about my birthday anymore, that tends to happen after you reach a certain age.  The one thing I always look forward to my mom's happy birthday song.  I really need to record her singing that song.  You know I love pictures so here's a picture of us from that day. I have no idea who that hat belonged to but it was being passed around and everyone took pictures wearing it.

I've been busy delivering baskets here in the Dominican Republic and I'm happy to report that we met our goal of blessing 30 expectant mothers here.  We actually exceeded our goal.  While delivering the baskets to the expectant mothers we were always encountering young mothers with older infants.  I had some larger size diapers so we made up gift packs for them also which included 12 diapers and a pack of wipes.  We didn't want anyone to feel left out.  While I've been here delivering baskets my daughter Jasmine has been very busy back home working to fill the requests we've received for mothers in the United States.  We sent our first six baskets out last week to expectant mothers in Ohio, Georgia, Iowa, Michigan and Florida.  One of the mom's gave birth last week and she shared a picture of her newborn with us, he's adorable.    We're having an event next week in Harrisburg, PA.  It's an open house and basket assembly event.  I hope the community comes out to learn more about what we're doing and discuss how they can help.  During the event we will assemble the baskets for our October due dates.

I'm headed home tomorrow for a few weeks.  I'm actually going to be home for a week then going to Mexico with my youngest daughter for a few days.  This part is never easy, leaving my husband.  There's so much to do it seems before I leave.  We've both been running around like chickens with our heads cut off for the past few days trying to gather information, documentation etc for the attorney for this next phase of his immigration process.  This was a short update this week.  I'll be in touch and let you all know where things stand with phase two.

Oh just in case you're feeling generous I'm including the link to Paypal site where you can make donations to A Blessing For You.

https://www.paypal.com/us/fundraiser/charity/3398122

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Status Quo

Hello all it's been a few weeks since I posted so I thought I should update you all on what's been happening around here.  As the title says it's pretty much been status quo.  I started this blog to chronicle my experiences as I navigated through learning how to be a Dominican Housewife.  I shared with you the challenges of cooking, cleaning and just general cultural differences.  Some of these experiences were funny and others were very educational.  I've gotten into a rhythm and for the most part things run smoothly.  My days usually start with a nice walk along the waterfront which is called the malecon.   This picture is one I took a few days ago during my walk.


I realized in my last post I didn't really give an update about my husbands vacation.  He was off work for three weeks and I was concerned about how him being here everyday for three weeks would affect my routine.  Ha, well there was no routine for three weeks ya'll. We also had house guests for  two of the weeks he was off.  Things went well for the most part.  There were a few challenges along the way but my husband and I always seem to find a way to resolve them without too much fuss.  Let's see one of the challenges was that no matter where we were going his daughter would be in the bathroom getting ready for at least an hour although my husband said it was two hours LOL.  I should mentioned that one of our house guests only spoke German.  So communication was a real challenge around here, even more so than usual LOL.  My husband only speaks Spanish, I primarily speak English and a little Spanish.  German wasn't being spoken much at all.  The only person who could communicate with everyone was his daughter who is a lovely young lady but she's also a pre teen and they can be moody.Th

ere was the cockroach incident.  This one was very traumatic for me.  One night I walked into the bedroom to find a very large cockroach crawling out of my CPAP machine mask.  Yes I died for about 30 seconds and then had a complete meltdown for another 20 minutes before my husband returned to the house.  By the time he got here the roach had been properly killed and fortunately I had another mask and tube here with me for my machine so my husband switched it out for me after disposing of the roach. My mask and tube are now kept in a plastic airtight container when not in use.  Ok before I get into the next incident the dog is fine.  My neighbor's dog is kept up on the roof.  Many people here keep their dogs on their roofs to keep them away from all the stray dogs roaming around.  My neighbors dog likes to jump over onto our roof from time to time.  Here is a picture of her on my roof.  Well one day last week she decided to jump. I think she jumped because the neighborhood strays were in front of the house taunting her.  Anyway she's fine and back up on the roof.  I honestly don't know if she learned her lesson and won't jump again but I'll keep you posted. Last but not least we had a baby geiko who got into the house, crawled in between the glass of our coffee table and died.  So we had to extract the dead critter from the table.  Remember guys I don't like critters at all so I'm way outside of my comfort zone here but I'm surviving.

  

  

Anyway during his vacation we had  beach days, pool days, lazy days around the house and we visited the park where we got married back in October.  It was actually the first time since we got married that my husband and I have been back there together so we took some pictures in a couple of the locations where we took wedding photos.  

Here are a couple from our wedding day and ones we took recently near the same spots as the original pictures.

It was nice to visit again with my husband.  I often visit this location as it's close to my daily walk location.  It's a very beautiful place.

So back to status quo.  After my walk I usually visit one of the three supermarkets I frequent in town.  Back to the house to handle whatever household chores need done on that particular day, laundry, general cleaning and of course cooking.  It doesn't take me as long to handle these household chores as it did in the beginning so I have plenty of time during the day while my husband is at work to take care of things for my non profit A Blessing For You.   In fact it's consuming a lot of my time which is awesome, at least I think so.  The other day I was so engrossed in putting together baskets that I forgot to finish fixing dinner.  When my husband came home from work only the potatoes where done.  I forgot to cook the meat LOL.
During this trip I planned to bless 30 expectant mothers with Blessing Baskets and thus far we have delivered 18 baskets and the remaining 12 baskets will be delivered in the next two weeks.  As we deliver the baskets we've been updating our Facebook page with pictures and we've gotten a great response.  We've received 25 requests from women in the United States requesting baskets from 13 different states.  Needless to say when I get back to Pennsylvania I'm going to be busy LOL.  I started a Go Fund Me campaign to help purchase more supplies to meet the demand.  I'm including the link here in case you are interested in making a donation to this great cause.  https://www.gofundme.com/a-blessing-for-you
We also accept supplies which are needed to create the baskets.  I've attached a flyer which provides a list of the supplies needed.

That's all for now.  I'll be in touch again in a few weeks.  Again I invite you all to visit my page on Facebook A Blessing For You and our website www.AblessingForYou.org

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Knowledge vs. Wisdom

Here is a picture of my husband with his daughter this week   My stepdaughter who is twelve has been visiting us from Germany for the past two weeks.  My children are all grown so it’s been awhile since I’ve had a pre-teen girl in the house.  Well let me tell you it brought back some memories and not all of them were fond LOL.  It was great watching the action from the sidelines though and being the stepmother I’m the nice parent which was kinda fun.  I’m sure my children would say that I wasn’t so nice when they were growing up LOL.  Watching my husband interact with his daughter brought me back to my childhood and even when I was raising my own children.  

Things you wish you would have listen to or things you wished you would have said.

I realized a long time ago that I really should have listened to my mother and my grandparents more when I was growing up.  Someone once told me that the longer you live the more you learn.  When I heard this, I thought well of course dummy everyone knows that.  What I now realize is that no matter how much schooling you have or how many books you read in your lifetime you may acquire knowledge but acquiring wisdom is a completely different skill.  Let me explain.  If you ask google for the definition of knowledge it says this, facts, information and skills acquired through experience or education; the theoretical or practical understanding of a subject.  The definition of wisdom is, the quality of having experience, knowledge, and good judgement; the quality of being wise.  So, it seems that having wisdom involves more than just having knowledge it involves using your knowledge in such a way that would be considered good judgement or wise.  I think I can finally say that I’m at a point in my life where I have acquired some wisdom, not as much as my mother has but certainly more than my children have.  There are so many things I could list as things I should have listened to my mother about but for this blog post I’m going to focus on one area.  It’s not really something she tried to tell me that I didn’t listen to or follow it’s more something she tried to explain to me and until now I really didn’t have the knowledge or wisdom to understand.

I grew up most of my life as an only child and my mom was a single mom.  She remarried when I was in my late teens and adopted two little girls but for most of my childhood it was just me and mom.  From my perspective we weren’t rich, but I didn’t consider us to be poor either.  I had a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in, clothes to wear and most of the things I wanted.  I say most things because there were two things in my childhood that I always wanted but never got, the first is a hamster.  That never happened because my mom does not like rodents at all.  Like she can’t even look at a picture of them.  The second thing I always wanted was the big box of crayons.  You know the 64-crayon box with the sharpener in the back.  I always wanted that, but I never got it as a child.  I think was I was almost 30 years old my mom finally got me the 64-crayon box and to this day I still have it hidden away in my closet from my grandchildren.  It was probably one of the best gifts my mom ever gave me.  It’s kind of like the running joke between my mom and me.  I used to tease her all the time about my creativity being limited because I didn’t have all the crayon colors.   

Besides not having all the crayons I had a great life as a child.  My mom and I had and still have a special bond.  I watched how hard she worked, and I was very aware of the fact that she worked and made money and that’s how the bills got paid.  From a very young age, sometime in elementary school I can recall sitting at the dining room table with my mom once a month because she only got paid once a month.  Once a month she would go through all the bills and put the money into separate envelopes.  That was her budget system and it worked well for us because I can never recall a time where my basic needs weren’t met.  I didn’t understand everything, but I knew enough to know that my mom needed that job to keep things afloat.  I think one of the most traumatic things for me as a child was the day that my mom came home from work and told me that she quit her job.  I was a young teenager at this point and I remember feeling horrified.  My mom seemed so happy and calm and inside I was freaking out.  I recall asking my mother why she quit her job and at the time I didn’t understand but I recall her reasons being something like she wanted to do more with her life, she wanted to find herself.  I was thinking to myself, well how are all the bills going to get paid?   For the first time in my life I felt insecure but maybe it was foolish of me to feel so secure in the first place.  Anyway, we survived, we never slept in our car or anything like that.  Things changed a bit, but we made it.  I have always attributed that experience to my inability to take risk.  I’ve never been interested in any job where there wasn’t a base salary.  I had to know what my income was going to be on a bi weekly or monthly basis. 

Fast forward to now and why this childhood experience is relevant now.  In 2017 I took an early retirement offer from my job of 27 years.  I loved my job and I’m way too young to retire but something was pulling me away from that corporate American life.  It wasn’t my husband in fact I made the decision to take the early retirement the week before I met him.  The offer came in Sept 2016 and I made the decision to accept it in Oct 2016 right before my trip to the Dominican Republic with my daughter Jennifer and that is when I met my now husband.  The retirement package that I took gave me an 18-month payout instead of a lump sum.  At the time 18 months seemed like a long time to figure out what would be next for me.  Well now it’s month 16 and I’m getting a little anxious about what’s next.  It’s like that feeling I had when my mom told me that she quit her job BUT it’s different now because I completely understand now what she meant when she said she wanted to do more with her life and to find herself.  As I’m nearing the end of my payout I too feel like I’m not sure returning to corporate America is where I belong.  I feel like there’s something else that I am supposed to be doing with my life.   I also have a strong feeling that being here in the Dominican Republic now with my husband is a part of me finding my way to the answer.  Over the past two years I’ve been doing things to set myself up for something else.  I completed a Chaplaincy program which allows me to be a volunteer chaplain for one of the local hospitals in my hometown.  I also completed a course and have my certification now as a Certified Recovery Specialist.   I also recently started a non-profit organization called A Blessing For you.  We provide blessing baskets to new mothers in need.   I haven’t quite figured out how all the pieces fit together yet, but I know there’s something bigger out there for me.  Bigger not necessarily from a monetary perspective but bigger from an impact perspective.  So, stayed tuned as I continue on my journey.  

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - When the door closes

Hello everyone.  I've been back for 12 days and I think I can finally say things are back to normal here.  I came back with a head cold which had me down for a few days.  Just as I was back on my feet and working on getting the household affairs back in order my husband came down with a cold which was much worse than mine (at least according to him).  He's a trooper though he didn't miss any time of work but once he got home I was in full nursemaid mode, making tea and trying my best to get him to take medicine.  I have my stash of medicine from the US with me,  you know the basics NyQuil and DayQuil.  Well those don't look like anything he's used to so it wasn't easy convincing him to take it.  I finally just gave up and went to the pharmacy to get something he was more familiar with.  It's still not easy getting him to take medicine.  He's one of those people who prefers to tough it out or natural remedies.  The good news is that as I write this post he's on the mend and just in time for his vacation which officially starts on Monday.

I'm happy to report that my cooking skills remained in tact even though I took a month off.  There haven't been any bad rice incidents or anything burnt, over or under cooked.  I guess you can say cooking is like riding a bike LOL.  As for laundry well I remembered the process just fine but  my husband seems to have forgotten to rules around what clothes to place where so my first laundry day consisted of me washing almost a full load of already clean clothes.  In my defense they were very close to the dirty clothes hamper and NO I don't smell the clothes before I wash them (My husband asked me this question).  If the clothes are in, on or anywhere remotely close to the dirty clothes hamper they are getting washed. 

I titled this post when the door closes because while talking to a good friend of mine this week I expressed to her that one of the things I still struggle with is the door being open all day.  So here's the deal.  When my husband wakes up in the morning one of the first things he does is open the front door.  Once the door is open it stays open all day until we are ready to go to bed at night.  This doesn't just apply to the front door in our house.  It's just a cultural thing.  Most doors are open here and that means that everyone is visiting and talking (mostly yelling) to each other from house to house.  This steady stream of visitors throughout the day means that my husband is always entertaining someone. So when I was talking to my friend I told her that I don't feel like I get any of my husbands time until the door closes at night.  Of course I'm exaggerating a little bit but not much. I talked to my husband about it and he confirmed that this is the culture here, people hanging out, visiting etc especially in the evenings after dinner time.  He encouraged me to join him on the porch and not to stay inside away from him and his friends which is what I typically do.  I'm working on it but it's a little uncomfortable for me to be sitting among a group of men with no other women around and especially when they are all speaking Spanish and it's hard for me to follow the conversation.  This picture is one I took a few days ago.  After my husband's friends left he closed the door and we shared some time together with him laying on my lap.  I posted a black and white version of this picture on Facebook a few days ago with the caption 'when the door closes my heart is full'.  It lead to some pretty interesting comments and responses. Some confusion about what I meant but at the end of the day I knew what it mean so that's all that matters.

A brief update on my non profit.  I had a Spanish version of my logo created for the baskets here.  I filed my application for tax exempt status and am awaiting a reply.  I am waiting for the supplies I sent over to arrive so that I can start putting baskets together and delivering them to the women in need.

My husband is off work for the next three weeks so things are about to get real interesting.  I'm a creature of habit and I love my routine.  With him here with me everyday all day my daily routine is out the door that of course will always be open:-)

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Babies & other new beginnings

Hello everyone I'm back in the DR now.  I took a few weeks off while I was in PA.  I arrived in PA on June 10th and my newest grand baby couldn't wait to meet me. He wasn't due until June 28th but he decided to come on June 12th.  All is well with mommy and baby.  It actually worked out well that he came sooner than expected because I had more time to spoil him to death, oh yes and of course help my daughter out too LOL. This is my daughters third, the others are 8 and 1 1/2.  I have no clue what she was thinking having another one so soon after the little princess Jaleah but hey he's here now so she's going to have to figure it all out and she is.  I think each day gets a little less stressful for her and her boyfriend.  Here's one of his first pictures from the hospital.

My youngest sister was also expecting and her little (well actually not so little) bundle was born on June 18th.  Meet my newest nephew Avery James Cruz Wimms.  These two little guys are just precious but there's clearly a big difference.  Jalique the oldest is about two pounds lighter than Mr. Avery.  We're signing him up for football now, Redskins of course LOL.

This trip back home was the longest period of time that my husband and I have been apart since we got married in October.  It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  Of course I missed him terribly but I guess I was just so busy holding the babies that I didn't miss my daily housewife chores LOL.  You know I only cooked one time the entire month I was home.  My husband complained almost daily about how much he missed my cooking.  Little did he know that I wasn't cooking anything while in PA.  My youngest daughter Jenni and I were on a mission to visit all of our favorite restaurants while I was home and I must say that we did a pretty good job because towards the end of my visit we were having a tough time coming up with places to eat.

I actually did get some other important things accomplished while I was home I didn't just eat all day long.  I'm happy and excited to announce that I started a non profit organization called A Blessing For You.  This organization is designed to provide new mothers with supplies to help them during the first weeks following delivery and connect them to other community resources.  This is something that I had been thinking about and working on for the past couple of months while I was in the Dominican Republic.  Initially I wanted to start locally in my hometown of Harrisburg, PA however the more I thought about it and prayed about it I realized that the need for this was much greater in the Dominican Republic.  In the Dominican Republic when you go to the hospital to have a baby you have to bring everything with you.  The hospitals there do not supply anything at all.  No blankets, diaper, wipes or anything for the baby or the mother.  Instead of waiting to get this started when I'm  back in PA permanently I decided to start now where the need is greater and do more than just be a housewife while I am in the Dominican Republic.   While I was home in PA this time things just took off and I was able to get my paperwork filed with the state and I have my Facebook page and website up and running.  I'm working on my tax exempt status paperwork for the federal government now.  I've started to receive donations and was able to secure enough supplies to send over three boxes full of items to create 30 blessing baskets for new mothers here in the Dominican Republic. Here is a picture of a sample basket unwrapped and wrapped.

Attached is an informational flyer which lists the types of items needed.

There are so many women in need so please share this information with your network and consider making a donation of supplies or a monetary donation.

I came back to the DR with a little head cold so it's going to be a slow start to regaining the momentum I had when I left to keep up with my daily chores.  I hope I remember how to cook for my husband ya'll LOL.
The boxes I sent over will take a couple of weeks to arrive but once they do I will be full steam ahead putting the baskets together and distributing them to as many as possible.

Stay tuned for more from this Dominican Housewife/Non Profit Organization Owner

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - Just Getting Started

Hello friends.  Things for me and my hubby have pretty much been status quo for the past week.  I decided to dedicate this post to all of the graduates.  For the past few weeks my social media timelines have been flooded with graduation pictures.  This picture is of one of the special graduates in my life. She graduated from high school last week.  It's hard for me to wrap my head around the fact that this lovely young lady is just that a young lady now.  I remember the day she was born, I was there but unfortunately I wasn't able to be there to watch her walk across the stage.  Thanks to social media I was able to see her walk via Snap chat.  Seeing her brought me to tears. Of course there were many pictures taken of her graduation but I love this picture because of the sign she's holding that says Just getting started.  So many view their last days in high school as the end of something but as you often hear during many commencement addresses it's really the beginning of the rest of your life.  As I watched many of my friends celebrating this joyous occasion for their children or other close family and friends I tried to remember my high school graduation.  It was a long time ago (I'm not admitting to exactly how long but it was long, that's all you need to know LOL).  I can remember some things very clearly as if it happened yesterday but for other things I can't recall.  One thing I know for sure is that what I'm doing right now with my life isn't at all what I thought I would be doing.  Heck what I'm doing right now isn't what I thought I'd be doing five years ago LOL. I'm sure that's true for so many of us and that's not necessarily a bad thing.  I think its important for us to look at each day as a new beginning or an opportunity to star anew.  It's a tough world that we are living in right now and these young people are being faced with challenges that are brand new and pretty scary.  On the flip side I also see opportunity for this generation and I pray that as many of them as possible seize the opportunity and make their mark in a positive way on this world.  I don't know maybe I shouldn't say that, it could make someone feel as if I am putting the weight of the world on their shoulders.  That definitely isn't my intent. 

Let me explain further.  Every since I retired I've had this feeling that I'm supposed to be doing something to help people.  I know I'm supposed to be helping people but there's like billions of people right?  So what people am I supposed to be  helping?  Am I supposed to be helping people that are asking me for help?  Am I supposed to be helping those who aren't asking but clearly need help?  I'm not sure and a few weeks ago an idea came to me about how I could target a specific population of people to help.  I got my inspiration for moving forward from something I saw on social media.  Not the actual concept itself but the inspiration to go for it.  I saw information about a non profit that is cleaning the ocean.  When you first think about it, cleaning the ocean?  The ocean is huge like how do you clean the ocean?  That's kinda how I've been feeling all this time about how do I help people?  There are so many people in so many places that need help.  I'm just one person.  How do I do that?  The answer is you start with what's in front of you or what's around you.  Do what you can to make a difference there and take it from there.  You don't stand at the bottom on the steps and say ugh that's too many steps and turn and walk away you start climbing and if you need to rest you rest but you keep climbing.  Anyway I got my inspiration from that company I saw who is cleaning the ocean because like I said I've been sitting here in this space for several months.  Thinking to myself and saying out loud that I'm supposed to be helping people but I have no idea where to start.  Seeing what that other company is doing let me know that I can't look at things as it's too much or it's too big of a task for me because everything starts somewhere.  You know everything started with one person who had an idea, a thought or a passion for something and then others joined in and they created this big force that allowed them to do this great thing and make a difference.   Back to the 2018 graduates, my prayer and hope is that they all see this as a new beginning, the next chapter in their lives.  I hope that they are all inspired to go out there and do what they are called to do, whatever that may be.  Change starts with the man or woman in the mirror. 

I'm going to be back in the United States for a few weeks.  I'm on baby watch now.  I'm expecting a new grand baby in a few weeks and my sister is also due anytime now.  Stay tuned for cute baby pictures and more stories from this Dominican Housewife.

Dominican Housewife Chronicles - What he says vs what he means

This is one of our most recent pictures together while at the beach.  My husband doesn't like the beach.  I honestly have no idea how you can live on this beautiful island and not love the beach but anyway I love when he makes the sacrifice for me.  It's even better when it's his suggestion.

Okay everyone this post is about how my husband communicates with me.  If you've been following my blog you know that my husband is Dominican and speaks Spanish and I'm American and I speak English.  I've been spending a lot of time here in the Dominican Republic over the past year so I'm learning Spanish enough to hold a simple conversation.  My husband is learning but not as fast as me.  He and I have developed a way of communicating that works for us, sometimes better than others but we usually figure it out.  Some of the examples I'm going to share with you today really don't have much to do with the difference between Spanish and English but sometimes the language barrier does play into our miscommunication.  For those of you who don't know Spanish at all this will be somewhat of a Spanish lesson for you.

The first word is Ahora - This means now in English.
When my husband says Ahora it can mean different things depending on the activity.  For example if it's something I want then Ahora means in the very near future.  If it's something he wants then ahora actually means that he's known about it for several days but didn't tell me about it until just now and AHORA means I was supposed to be ready 10 minutes ago.  You can imagine how annoying this is right?  I'm learning though.  He's a creature of habit so I watch him now and I can tell when there's going to be an AHORA event coming that I need to be prepared for.  This usually happens when he has a baseball game.  I've learned which days the games typically occur on so I can be prepared and he's not always being a total jerk it's just sometimes hes waiting to decide if he's going or not.  He plays on so many different teams.

Next let's discuss the word Hoy.  This means today in English.
When my husband says Hoy it actually most of the time means today but it can also just mean, yeah one day that might happen but not ahora LOL.  If I ask him to do something or go somewhere if I get the Si, hoy response it's a good thing.

Manana - This means tomorrow in English.
When my husband says it it means not now (ahora) it might happen tomorrow if I actually remember it or feel like it but it is something I'm somewhat interested in.

Next up is the phrase Mas Tarde - This means later in English.
When my husband says Mas Tarde it actually means I'm really not interested in that at all so I'm going to say mas tarde and hope that you forget about it or maybe I can talk  you out of it cause it's just not going to happen.  So in my house mas tarde means later or never.  It took me awhile to catch on to this one but I finally figured it out so when I hear the mas tarde response I press for a hoy or manana instead.  The mas tarde isn't my friend LOL.

Temprano - This means early in English.
When my husband uses this word for him it's going to happen soon, but for me when he says temprano he's really asking me why I'm not finished yet with whatever I'm doing LOL.

This next one is my favorite.  No cocinar hoy - This means do not cook today.  My husband has a habit of telling me this on Sunday's.  He says "No cocinar hoy, tu trankilla in casa hoy."  Basically you don't cook for me today you relax in the house today.  What he means is I don't want you to spend a lot of time in the kitchen today cooking a big meal BUT when I'm hungry later (mas tarde) I want you to be able to whip something up quick.  So the first time this happened I wasn't prepared and I was mad as a hornet.  I demanded an explanation and he told me that me warming up the leftovers or making a quick sandwich wasn't considered cooking which I guess is true.  Like I said before I'm learning and I'm hip to his little no cocinar hoy trick and I'm ready every time.  In fact it's become somewhat of a joke between us.  Kinda like when I ask him if he wants popcorn while we watch TV at night and he says no.  I always fix enough for us both because I learned a long time ago that his hand is going to be in the bowl and he usually eats more than half of the bowl.

This next word has been the source of major challenges between my husband and I especially while in the car.  The Spanish word derecho means two things, to go straight and to turn right.  You can imagine how nerve racking this can be while driving in an unfamiliar place getting directions from someone who only speaks Spanish.  Fortunately I've learned my way around this city now and my husband does most of the driving when we are out together.

When it matters the most he says what he means like when he says Te amo mucho (I love you a lot) or when he says in English you're beautiful :-)