Empty Spaces

Hello everyone.  Here's our most recent picture from my visit last week.
Time for an update so here goes.  This post is titled empty spaces because these days I’m constantly surrounded by empty spaces.  Back in November prior to our visa appointment I frantically cleaned out closets and drawers to make room for my husbands things.  Our appointment was on December 3^rd so I knew that he’d be home for the holidays.  Well it’s now over four months later and those spaces I cleared for him are still empty.  The space on his side of the bed, empty.  His side of the closet, empty.  The drawers I cleaned out for him, all empty.  The presents I had for him for Christmas are still wrapped and waiting for him to come open them.  They are still in the living room right next to where the tree had been.  Although these spaces are empty and I’m sad sometimes my heart is full.  Yes I’m angry at times because we seem to be stuck in this administrative processing cycle with his visa application, my heart is still full of love and hope. 

Update on the visa shenanigans is that more documents submitted on March 5^th and then again on April 2^nd.  Each time we receive the call or the email asking for more documentation it’s so frustrating.  I think this last time I cried for a solid hour.  Despite all of this I know that I am so blessed.  During the last snow storm I was in a particularly bad mood.  I was mad that I woke up alone and had to shovel the snow alone and drive to work in the snow alone (I hate driving in the snow).  I was texting my daughters and complaining about it all and my youngest daughter sent me this message:

Mom things aren’t exactly how you want them to be and I understand that but you have a lot to be grateful for.  You woke up today, you’re physically able to shovel because at some points in your life you weren’t able to.  You have a job to drive in the snow to be late to.  You have a husband that loves you like you’ve always wanted, even though he’s not physically with  you right now.

Upon  receiving this message from my daughter I had an instant attitude adjustment.  Of course everything she said was true but more than that I was so proud that my daughter was able to help me to remember just how blessed I was.  I’m keeping myself busy working, my new job is okay.  It’s kinda slow right now but I’m hopeful things will pick up soon.  I’m also helping my mother out with her parenting classes in the evenings so my schedule is busy.  Monday through Thursday I leave the house at 7 am and don’t return until around 9 pm.  It’s a hectic schedule but I don’t mind it much because being in the house alone for too much time allows me to focus on those empty spaces. 

I've also been focusing on helping my youngest daughter prepare for the birth of her baby boy, Cameron.  He's due May 13th but she's convinced that he's coming sooner.  We'll see. Here is a picture of us together at her baby shower a few weeks ago.  

I miss my husband very much.  These past few months have been a big adjustment for both of us.  Since we got married we had  never  been apart longer than a few weeks.  That’s changed now.  Over the holidays we were apart for five weeks and most recently we were apart for 8 weeks.  I’ve just returned from a  brief visit and at this point there are no plans for me to return.  We expect to submit the final requested documents and get approved for his visa so that he can join me here.

That's all for now.  I will try to stay in touch more often.

Thanks for stopping by.

Terri D.