A reason, a season or a Lifetime

 

Friends first I want to thank you all for your support over the past few years. It has meant a lot to me.  Many of you have followed my story and been a part of this journey with me. I have always been transparent with you about this process, and I choose not to stop now.  I titled this post A reason a season or a lifetime because it’s the title of one of my favorite poems. I’ll share it here with you in case you’ve never read it.

Reason, Season, of Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you figure out which one it is you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty; to provide you with guidance and support; to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are.  They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.  Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a season because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it. It is real, BUT only for a season.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons; things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind, but friendship is clairvoyant.

Author Unknown

I am coming out of a season. The past 4 ½ years has been a special season. I took an early retirement in 2017 and spent a lot of time in the Dominican Republic with my love whom I married that same year.  Many of you have kept up with our story after we got married as I chronicled my experiences living there as a Dominican housewife. When I returned to the states to work in 2019 you all hung in there with me as I chronicled our fight for his visa and struggled with being apart from him. Then the pandemic hit in early 2020 and we were forced to be apart for 16 months. We waited patiently and prayed for a positive response to the papers hubby submitted in August of 2020.  Finally on May 14^th of this year his visa was approved and on May 28^th he arrived.

Well friends I am deeply sorry to report that team Martinez is no longer together. Although we had lived together before things are quite different here and after only 6 weeks hubby decided to leave. I believe that for him I was a reason. I have gone back and forth with my feelings about everything. I am still very hurt and disappointed in this outcome. I put my heart and soul into this relationship and honestly, I just wished he’d given us a little more time to work the kinks out. But we are where we are at this point. Ultimately, we were two different people who wanted different things. The reality is that people love differently due to many factors and in the end our differences have led us to this outcome.  Although I’m hurt and disappointed I am trying to focus on the good.  I had the time of my life these past few years. It’s an experience I will never forget.  The past few weeks have been full of many emotions for us both.  I can finally say that we’ve made peace with our decisions. My wounds will eventually heal, and I’ll be inspired to write again but for right now I’m taking a little hiatus from this blog and writing in general.  I’ll be back hopefully in the fall with something new. Thanks again for your support.

Weak

 Week # 4 

I titled this post weak because that's how I am feeling, weak. There's just so much to adjust to for us both. Coming out of the pandemic and being isolated for a year has also added a layer of complexity to this situation.  Anyway this week we experienced some new discoveries and realizations.  We added to our workout room.  He and my friends husband worked most of the day on Saturday putting together his new home gym. That was very entertaining for me since neither of them speaks the others language lol. They were able to figure it out though. This keeps him busy for a couple of hours after work each day so it's a win for me.

I introduced him to the Hershey outlets and well that lead to my realization that my husband is a shopaholic. He arrived with 2 pairs of shoes and now has at least 20.  I still have more than that so it's all good.  

We were both pleasantly surprised that 4 weeks to the day of his arrival his permanent resident card arrived.  We both breathed a sigh of relief and it was cause for celebration so we did.  Here's hubby sporting his USA shirt. 

He got his first full paycheck and of course didn't understand all of the taxes so that was fun trying to explain that to him lol. 

Most days he enjoys work and he loves being able to use the exercise equipment here at the house.  We've also added a couple of chairs and an umbrella to the small deck off our bedroom so we can sit out there in the mornings or evenings. I've had that deck for almost 15  years and never sat out there before.

We're both still being stretched outside of our comfort zones in so many ways.  It's just about what I expected it to be. Yes he works all of my nerves at times and I'm pretty sure I return that favor to him but at the end of the day we are still Team Martinez. 

Our next adventure is this coming weekend, we are hosting a couple of his friends for the weekend. This next post is going to be a good one. I'm sure you won't want to miss it.